mothers who stay with child abusers

Texts and family reunions

I heard back from my mother on my birthday a little while ago. She wished me a happy birthday, in a brief text message.  I was not happy.  I have not replied.

No Letter

My wife nailed it. She said “there isn’t going to be a letter, she didn’t get what she wanted.” According to my aunt, my mom has allegedly written a letter in response to the one I wrote her a few years ago. That letter I wrote 3 years ago is of course out of date, …

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Rape dreams and release

So I had ‘fending off rape dreams’ this morning, three consecutive ones. Not a big surprise, given how angry I’ve been lately. I tend to have ‘monsters/men are hurting me’ dreams when I’m angry. In my dreams I was successful at fighting the men off and not so successful at getting the police involved. My …

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Hangover

Today was the first day alone I’ve had since I got back from my trip to see my relatives. My house is a mess, something that if I don’t deal with soon, will probably put me at odds with my wife. I spent most of the day in bed reading, broken up but largely context-less …

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Visiting Family

Well, I went back east for a week to visit my moms siblings, my dad / abuser’s sister and a bunch of cousins and second cousins. It went very well, and I got a lot of loving supportive connection and reconnection and lots of validating and useful information. I’ve been researching sociopaths lately and am …

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Family Reunion

Don’t panic, it’s not MY family, it’s my wife’s. However, in the wake of my mother’s stalker-like note, I’m a bit twitchy about family. I normally like my wife’s family, they’re religious (in that gay-hating, women oppressing way, not the good way) but we stay away from that and they don’t tell us we’re going …

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Hand-delivered note from mom

I went out my front door and found the following note stuffed into my mailbox, hanging out. I recognized my mom’s handwriting at once. Here’s what it said: “July 9, 2010 Hi [SDW] & [Wife], A long time has passed. Maybe we could meet for “coffee” tea” soon. Love Mom” and then on a separate …

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Post therapy

Well, it’s been a couple of weeks now since my last therapy session I think. I’m choosing to spend time on the present day goals I have, improving my singing, finishing the book I’m writing, getting my physical health in better order, having fun. I’m feeling a bit isolated. Father’s day was hard this year, …

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