Self-Advocating for Medical Care for Adult Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse.
[about the image – no it’s not me, but I am pissed off no one told me what I needed to know about Lichen Sclerosis and let it get this bad. There aren’t a lot of triggers in this post, except one brief mention of a sexual injury having occurred. ] So a few years …
Content warning: sexuality, self pleasure, mention of vaginal injury. I have been doing an experiment this past 30 days or so. Regular readers of this blog will know that I have a vagina injured by a sexual assault when I was a small child, which has resulted in lifelong pain in that region, coming …
The last time I posted here was December 2015. Wow. That’s a long time ago. A lot has happened. The woman I was dating when I last wrote was a terrible human being. I was completely wrong about her. I was in the initial honeymoon of dating a very self-centred person. As I was writing, …
This post is chock full of triggers. No descriptions of actual abuse, but lots about injured vaginas and what works to make them feel better. A little bit of religious triggers if reading about Pagan stuff triggers you. Read at your own risk. _________________________________________________________________________ I have one messed up vagina. Physically, emotionally, spiritually. Actually spiritually it is …
Vulva – Healing the Physical Effects of Childhood Sexual Assault – Physical Self Care Read More »
Surprize! Getting the inflammation in my vulva down to a dull roar did not instantly fix my sex life. Surprize! Struggling while trying to restore my vulva to the state the Goddess intended for it brings up unexpected daddy issues. Surprize! The God makes a reappearance. Surprize! People can be exceptionally kind sometimes when you …
What a miracle this steroid cream is! I put it on and within an hour, I feel something I’ve never felt before. The pain, of burning and heat is replaced by a delicate feeling of wholeness, gentle presence and delicate fine-edged sensation. The feeling of gentle spray from my hand-helf shower head as I clean …
So I had my follow up visit with the gyne specialist last Friday. Here’s the skinny. I do not have planus lichen (SO glad I went ahead with the biopsy!) Instead I have a ‘chronic inflammatory skin condition’ of the vulva. Basically, she said that the technician could see that I had a chronic inflammatory …
Treatment and healing – chronic vulva inflammatory condition Read More »
So this thing that makes my vulva and vagina feel like it has a bad sunburn (sometimes a healing itchy one, sometimes a fresh hot painful one) is an autoimmune disorder, so I’m looking into autoimmune disorders to see what I can do to self-manage and care for my body. I don’t like the idea …
First off, the specialist did not help me assess the damage from the assault. I was disappointed. However, she did have a very credible theory for what could be causing my pain and took a biopsy to confirm. The biopsy was freaking painful and caused a lot of bleeding (they cut off a small piece …
Here’s an excerpt from the typed page I’m giving to the Ob/Gyn specialist later this morning: “What I am here for: 1) My goal is to improve my ability to mitigate the impact of my injuries on my sex life and daily level of pain and discomfort. I’d like help to figure out how not …
My neck has been particularly seized up since I found out about the appointment with the gynecologist. Coincidence? Not likely. Since the assault that caused the tearing in my vagina also caused a neck injury, the two are definitely linked. I believe in the saying “trust in God(s) but tie your camel”, which means to …
I just found out I have an appointment with a woman obstetrician/gynecologist for May 10th. The doctor who set up the appointment for me thought that an obstetrician might be a good doctor to help me, as the tearing is similar to tearing from birthing. I can’t find much about her online, but she teaches …
Note: This is probably triggering.It’s medical studies talking about vulva injuries in kids and how they heal. Read at your own risk. Here is a nice picture of a bunny to give you the opportunity to not read what is below if you don’t want to. I am doing some research to help find an …
Information for childhood sexual assault survivors with vaginal/vulvar injuries Read More »
I am going to blow my own horn here. I did good. First, some background. I had sex for the first time with a new lover recently and my vulva was really not happy afterward, directly related to my injuries. First off, my lover did not respond well to being told I had scars/injuries on …
How to get care for an vulva injured in childhood. Read More »
I’ve been reading Brene Brown’s recent book “Daring Greatly“. Most of the information is stuff I already know, but it’s good to review and there were some new bits. I recommend it for anyone wanting to learn about vulnerability and how to manage shame. She also has a number of TED videos which are excellent. …
I am an amazon! I had a pap test and negotiated for what I needed. Yay me. I went to the drop in clinic today because I have a stomach bug (at least that’s what I thought) that wasn’t going away. The doctor ruled out the bug pretty quickly and then asked if I had …
I wish I could write in more detail about my new lover and our first nights together, but the story is partly hers and not mine to share. All I feel comfortable saying is that it went well, and I was able to be a lot more open about my scarring than I had intended …
I haven’t written much because not much on the sexual abuse theme has been up lately. I’m happy. I smile. I look at old pictures of myself with a wistful look on my face and realize how profound that change is. I feel good physically. My year of working out twice a week with a …