Survivors of childhood sexual assault may have been physically injured, often in lasting ways, in addition to the emotional, spiritual, social and neurological injury.
[about the image – no it’s not me, but I am pissed off no one told me what I needed to know about Lichen Sclerosis and let it get this bad. There aren’t a lot of triggers in this post, except one brief mention of a sexual injury having occurred. ] So a few years […]
Lichen Sclerosis and Childhood Sexual Assault Read More »
Content warning: sexuality, self pleasure, mention of vaginal injury. I have been doing an experiment this past 30 days or so. Regular readers of this blog will know that I have a vagina injured by a sexual assault when I was a small child, which has resulted in lifelong pain in that region, coming
A 30 day experiment in self-love Read More »
This post is chock full of triggers. No descriptions of actual abuse, but lots about injured vaginas and what works to make them feel better. A little bit of religious triggers if reading about Pagan stuff triggers you. Read at your own risk. _________________________________________________________________________ I have one messed up vagina. Physically, emotionally, spiritually. Actually spiritually it is
Vulva – Healing the Physical Effects of Childhood Sexual Assault – Physical Self Care Read More »
Surprize! Getting the inflammation in my vulva down to a dull roar did not instantly fix my sex life. Surprize! Struggling while trying to restore my vulva to the state the Goddess intended for it brings up unexpected daddy issues. Surprize! The God makes a reappearance. Surprize! People can be exceptionally kind sometimes when you
Herne’s blessings – vulva healing and sexuality Read More »
What a miracle this steroid cream is! I put it on and within an hour, I feel something I’ve never felt before. The pain, of burning and heat is replaced by a delicate feeling of wholeness, gentle presence and delicate fine-edged sensation. The feeling of gentle spray from my hand-helf shower head as I clean
The painless vulva miracle Read More »
So I had my follow up visit with the gyne specialist last Friday. Here’s the skinny. I do not have planus lichen (SO glad I went ahead with the biopsy!) Instead I have a ‘chronic inflammatory skin condition’ of the vulva. Basically, she said that the technician could see that I had a chronic inflammatory
Treatment and healing – chronic vulva inflammatory condition Read More »
Here’s an excerpt from the typed page I’m giving to the Ob/Gyn specialist later this morning: “What I am here for: 1) My goal is to improve my ability to mitigate the impact of my injuries on my sex life and daily level of pain and discomfort. I’d like help to figure out how not
Courage, Perseverence, Gratitude Read More »
I just found out I have an appointment with a woman obstetrician/gynecologist for May 10th. The doctor who set up the appointment for me thought that an obstetrician might be a good doctor to help me, as the tearing is similar to tearing from birthing. I can’t find much about her online, but she teaches
I have an appointment! Read More »
Note: This is probably triggering.It’s medical studies talking about vulva injuries in kids and how they heal. Read at your own risk. Here is a nice picture of a bunny to give you the opportunity to not read what is below if you don’t want to. I am doing some research to help find an
Information for childhood sexual assault survivors with vaginal/vulvar injuries Read More »
I wish I could write in more detail about my new lover and our first nights together, but the story is partly hers and not mine to share. All I feel comfortable saying is that it went well, and I was able to be a lot more open about my scarring than I had intended
Life Full of Beauty Read More »
I haven’t written much because not much on the sexual abuse theme has been up lately. I’m happy. I smile. I look at old pictures of myself with a wistful look on my face and realize how profound that change is. I feel good physically. My year of working out twice a week with a
So I’ve been extra spacey lately since the news about the impending letter from my mom replying to the one I sent her three years ago. It’s not like I really notice the spaci-ness myself much, but my wife has noticed and pointed out a few things. This morning I forgot to feed my beloved dog, and
PTSD Spaciness triggered waiting for letter from mom Read More »
I just finished bringing my father / abuser’s file to the attention of the RCMP in connection with some murders of young women that have been happening in and around my home town during the time my family has lived there. I used an online tip form, because it seemed a lot easier to write
Knowing I have scar tissue has changed my life I think. It’s like an incontrovertable validation of what I’ve been saying all along. No longer can I doubt or go into denial about the accuracy of my memory. I know what happened and I was accurate all along. It is an immense relief. The other
In the wake of proof Read More »
So the gyne visit went about as well as it could possibly go, and better than I could have envisioned. The nurse-practitioner I saw was very experienced and nice and drew the correct line between warm sympathy and matter of factness. She said we could take as long as we needed, and she did the
Warrior Victorious in Pap Test Read More »
Okay, so I went bravely forth today on my quest to find a doctor to do a pap test. Like many survivors, I haven’t had a gyne exam in several years, in my case, about 8. I haven’t had (or thankfully, needed) any other medical care during that time. I have recurrent yeast infections (or