The concept of dancing on your abusers’ grave seems to have some resonance for survivors I’ve talked to. Not all of us are of Scottish heritage, or even interested in learning the sword dance or Ghillie Callum used for this purpose.
For those of you lucky enough to have dead abusers with graves ripe for dancing, I thought I’d provide a list of suggested songs. Perhaps between this and the comments we can come up with a nice long list.
- Flinty Kind of Woman – Dar Williams – this upbeat country song tells the story of a bunch of upscale New England matrons garrotting an attempted child molester in a bog.
“Going east of Mississippi got a flinty kind of woman And you don’t act smart and you don’t touch my children If the young man wants to see the sun go down” Here’s another sample (the words are great)
“And by the “Welcome to New England” sign
Got him with the fishing line
In the dark smell of brine
Betty said “This one is mine.”
She is ruthless ”
Here’s a link to the lyrics: http://darwilliams.net/music/tabs/flinty.html
- Independence Day – Martina McBride – story from a grown child’s perspective of her mom burning down the house to kill herself and her batterer.
“Let freedom ring,
let the white dove sing
let the whole world know that
Today is a day of reckoning
let the weak be strong, let the right be wrong
roll the stone away, let the guilty pay, its independence day.”
Click here to watch the video
- Concrete Angel – Another Martina McBride Song – more a grieving song about an abused child who died.
“Through the wind and the rain,
She stands hard as a stone in a world that she can’t rise above;
But her dreams give her wings and she flies to a place where she’s loved.”
Click here for full lyrics
View video here
- Goodbye Earl – Dixie Chicks – the story of two best friends who kill the battering spouse of one of the women after he disregards a restraint order and get away with it.
“Well she finally go the nerve to file for divorce, she let the law take it from there. But Earl walked right through that restraining order, and put her in intensive care. Right away Mary Anne flew in from Atalnta, on a red eye midnight flight. She held Wanda’s hand as they worked out a plan and it didn’t take long to decide that Earl had to die.”
Click here to watch the video – worth it to watch the gleeful dancing when he dies Celebrative and upbeat. Good for a grave-dancing.
- Testimony by Ferron – not super overt, but about strength among women after sexual assault, very pretty.
” But by my life be I spirit
And by my heart be I woman
And by my eyes be I open
And by my hands be I whole”
Click here for full lyrics
I don’ t have any good incest survivor pride songs yet, but maybe you have one.