Ah, that stuff they I read about family systems work is right. When you try and change a long-standing pattern, people freak out on you to try and get you to change back. The deal is that you’re supposed to respond in a low key manner. I wrote the follow-up email to my older brother, […]
Big fight with brother Read More »
This morning I woke up with some great ideas for the novel I’m writing for National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo to us novelists). I’m about a third of the way through my novel, which is pretty exciting, and I have figured out how it’s going to turn out. Novel writing is a bit like sculpting
I’ve had pain and itching in my vulva for most of my life. I’ve worn out holes in the fronts of underwear from scratching. This, I’ve found through some recent reading, is actually pretty common with vaginal injuries like mine. This summer, when I found out about the two tear scars and vascular damage, it
I did my full voice workout today, after a couple of days missing it. It felt good. I’m getting better at relaxing the muscles in my neck and remembering to keep my knees unlocked. I’m able to focus more. I changed the room I’m practicing in too, which seems to help.
Perseverence continued Read More »
I’m writing a novel for National Novel Writing Month. I’ve decided to do it here, and will be adding to this post throughout the month. The task is to write 50,000 words between November 1-30th. We’re not supposed to edit or review so this is the first draft, but I thought it might be interesting
The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other’s life. Rarely do members of one family grow up under the same roof. ~ Richard Bach
I did do my practice yesterday, and got a little farther into exercising my voice. I seem to do it best when my wife is around. She came home from an evening shift at work, and started practicing guitar, which gave me space to practice voice. I could hear her strumming in the other room
Persevererence & Change2Mind video Read More »
Skipped 2 days, did my singing practice today. Today I did it with my wife home, standing facing the door, and found it a lot easier to concentrate without getting flashbacky. (what is this about? click here to see the rest of this story. )
Perseverence continued Read More »
I was able to practice voice for longer last time, and it felt good. It’s amazing how alive I feel when I’m singing well. I still haven’t done the full routine, but I’m getting there. I had a long day today, and feel edgy and distracted. The last thing I want to do is put
Perseverence Practice – Day 4 Read More »
Well, I’ve managed to practice voice for two days now. Mostly I just did the physical stretches and some warm up vocalizations, not the actual practice, but I’m figuring out when in my day to do it, and I’ve remembered fairly late at night when I was tired. However, I did it anyway, which is
Perseverence Practice – Voice Day 3 Read More »
(Trigger warning to my ritual abuse survivor allies – the following has description of positive pagan ceremony. ) Last night I got together with a friend of mine who shares my religious beliefs. We got to talking about how neither of us are completing our creative projects to our satisfaction. As we talked, we both
unfinished business Read More »
Why is it I can get so much done at work on a computer and the rest of my time I don’t live my life as exuberantly and richly as I want to? It is almost a year since I found out my dad had been in the hospital with a cancer recurrence for
I was early for my therapy appointment today, and was sitting in the waiting room browsing magazines. I opened up a Buddhist one, Shambala Sun. The first article was about Buddhist jargon stuff that I never get and frankly find annoying. I studied philosophy so I’m quite comfortable with arguments that for example try to
Hi there, I haven’t been posting much because I’ve got marital stuff going on that doesn’t have much to do with the theme of this blog. I’ve also been away from my computer a lot. It’s all fine, I’m sorting it out, but that’s why I haven’t posted. I’ll post something more interesting when I’ve
Here’s a song I just wrote: “Scars to Prove It” Have you ever wondered how a child survives a horror? Do you think children are resilient or children they forget? Hiding from yourself, is necessary for survival Nice girls don’t make a fuss Nice girls they pretend they’re safe and loved 30 years or more
I’m out of shape and overweight. I’ve lost over 20 pounds this year, mostly water I think, just by counting calories and exercising a little. I’ve got about 30 more to go till I’m at the top range of what the most generous charts say I should weight for my height. Lately, I’ve been exercising
<–Warning – first sentence may be triggering —? When I was a teenager I remembered being sexually molested, touched under my panties, by a babysitter. I found out today, that the person I thought might be this babysitter has died. He’d died homeless, due to complications of severe alcoholism and cancer. I hadn’t known he’d
I’ve been telling my friends that coming back from my week at camp I feel like I’ve had a megadose of ultra-strength feminist Mother Earth vitamins. It’s not like I”m any different, just more of myself, and I feel stronger and more resilient. How important it is to be in a space where I can